It's so crazy to me, that Josh and I are going on a year being married. In only a few days, it'll be official. I have to say that I couldn't be happier. I have such a wonderful, loving husband. He's my rock, he's my world, he's my everything. A year ago as of Sunday the 5th, will mark the day that Josh and I decided to spend the rest of forever with each other. Our wedding was absolutely beautiful, and I am forever grateful to his parents for making that happen. If it hadn't been for them, I would have had a 2 minute wedding in front of a judge! Instead, I got to wear a beautiful white dress, Josh's mother did my hair, and I walked down the aisle to meet the man of my dreams at the alter. We were married, and a few months later we welcomed our first little one, James.
Josh and I had been talking about marriage for about a month before we found out we were pregnant. We have always been very open with each other, and had made a point to discuss situations that might arise in our relationship. From the start I told him, "If we get pregnant, I won't marry you just because I'm going to have your baby." It was important to me that we married for more than just a baby. I wanted to marry him for the love we shared, and the future we could create with each other. People who get married just because they're pregnant, is dumb to me. Yes, I believe its great to have a 'family' image for your baby. But you don't have to get married to do that.
When Josh and I found out we were pregnant, right before Christmas in 2010, we realized our relationship was headed into a long term place faster than we had anticipated. But just like always, we took it with stride. We talked for about a week or two about what was the best decision. At the time I was still using my mom's health insurance, and our first baby doctor appointment was a financial wake up call. To have a baby in a civillian (non military) hospital, along with all the baby visits before hand can cost anywhere from $3000 to $5000 dollars. Thats nuts!
Josh had just gotten out of the army, but he was retired, so he still got to keep his Tricare (military health insurance). It was at this time that Josh and I made a very grown up decision. We knew we didn't have to get married, but financially it would benefit us. We were already planning on getting married, we just weren't going to get married so soon. The baby just spend things up :P
So we got married, we had our little one. And we are such a wonderful family. I love my husband more than words can describe, and I love our baby boy even more. A family is a wonderful experience and blessing. I'm not a believer in God, and I'm not religious at all, but if anything could make someone wonder if there might be a higher power, it's giving birth. The incredible way my body can create and put together such a perfect little person is awe inspiring for sure.
Two years ago when I graduated high school, I didn't know where my life was headed. I wasn't really set on college, but I was going to go to community college because there was nothing else for me to do. I had no plans to live anywhere else to live but my mothers house, and I was miserable.
My big brother and his wife at the time came down for my graduation, and on a whim they asked me to come to San Antonio for a few days afterwards to visit. I jumped at the opportunity, and those few days is when I met Josh. From there, my brother asked me to come live with him to get out of my mom's house. I could live with him, work and figure out school. It wasn't a hard decision, and I honestly didn't even think long about it. All I knew, is that I had to get out of my mom's house. I was being suffocated there.
So I moved to San Antonio, and my future flashed before my eyes. My future was Josh, everything I needed, everything I could become was through him. He was the future I couldn't see before because I hadn't found him yet. In high school I could never picture my future. I couldn't see myself getting married, having kids or even going to college and having a career. Suddenly, meeting Josh and coming to love him, I saw a future that I wanted.
I would do it all again :)
I've never loved any one more. This love makes all the other times I thought I was in love look like puppy love, or infatuation. This is real love. This is love for the rest of my life and beyond. <3
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